I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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