Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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