Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize