They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize