no, he came in my armpit
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
