fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
