i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Damn victory sex feels great
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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