I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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