Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
