If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
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He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
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