i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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