You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
