I cannot find my penis.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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