Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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