Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
