just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
