did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
