I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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