I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
The adults are the big ones right?