But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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