Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You can't just leave with hair like that
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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