So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
