It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Randomize
