Do vagina's smell?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
