Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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