after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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