i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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