Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
