My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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