doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
