i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize