There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize