no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
