Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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