You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Randomize