help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
