I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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