Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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