***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I think I died a long time ago.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
