How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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