You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
So many bounce houses so little time
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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