Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
