Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
be right there i have to get my cape
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
