I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Randomize