PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
A bitchslap is in order.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
