You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
they're like a gay fantastic four
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
