Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you didnt know i had herpes?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
