Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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