I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize
