What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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