Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
